From Resentful to Fruitful: Answering the Call through Money and Spirituality
“I hate money!” Ok… that may not be entirely true. Well at least not now, especially after taking the Money and Spirituality course with Karen McAllister. As I reflect on the person I am today, I can honestly say that this course has been a gift to the flourishment of my being. Considering where I started six months ago, a person who sincerely believed that she hated money and firmly held that in her consciousness, to the present moment, a person who is actually quite comfortable with money and might even love it. Yikes! Karen took me on a journey, a journey that revealed many of the deep patterns buried into my shadow that paralleled other areas of my life. Under her guidance, she inspired me to acknowledge and create massive shifts that brought me closer to my path of financial stability and abundance. In this blog, I share with you my money and spiritual journey from being the resentful innocent to the fruitful warrior.
Once upon a time there was a 24 year girl who thought living the solo apartment dream in Toronto was the best accomplishment possible. I mean how could it not be? Who doesn’t love spending their entire paycheck on rent, insurance, gas, groceries, pets and furniture with just enough money to buy discounted wine and chocolate from the corner store. If that doesn’t sound like the dream, then I don’t know what is, right? No, wrong; very wrong! If there’s one thing that I’ve learned it’s that solo apartment living is overrated and being isolated isn’t really that fun. I had a growing intuition that something needed to change but I didn’t really know what that was. Following those breadcrumbs, I came across the Money and Spirituality course on the Clear Sky Website and felt the call to further explore.
Over the course of this program, I discovered many insights from Karen’s teachings. One is that I am the ‘innocent type’ in my relationship to money, meaning I outsource a lot of the financial responsibility to others, initially with my parents and later with intimate partners. I created a thick barrier between myself and the art of skillfully creating wholesome streams of income. I felt stuck in my salaried position as a nurse because more money meant more gruesomely long hours at the hospital and less recovery time for self-care. I also learned that money doesn’t just come. There are deep inner workings in the shadow that subconsciously create various blocks without our awareness. Me being the innocent archetype meant that regardless of how much money I tried to create on my own, inevitably my financial source came from an external figure. Another understanding I gained is that generosity actually brings fruition. Money isn’t meant to be preserved, it was created to flow in an abundant cycle. The moment I let go of my money, I am sending a message to the universe that I trust it will come back.
“The journey of coming to Clear Sky was an incredible learning curve for me.”
With all of these insights, I was very eager to take the next step and book a one on one coaching session with Karen. I came to the realization that the 3 month Karma Yoga program at Clear Sky was what my being was called to do next in which Karen supported me dearly. We created a fierce financial plan to get me to my goal. How much money was I going to need for these 3 months and how was I going to get it? The only asset that I really had was my designer furniture and so it was the first thing I sold. Next, I saved all of my paychecks and only spent what was absolutely necessary, with a few chocolate bars on the side, of course. My apartment lease ended right before the Karma Yoga program started in June. I took it as a sign that it was time for me to launch, to which Clear Sky was ready to catch me. I did have some unexpected drawbacks though, taxes being due and having to stay an extra month in my apartment. But what’s a few setbacks that a warrior can’t handle?
The journey of coming to Clear Sky was an incredible learning curve for me. It required me to commit to a goal and follow through with it. It brought forth the need for me to learn new skills and apply them. It encouraged me to take a risk, and jump without knowing exactly what was going to be on the other side. I am forever grateful for the experience and wisdom that I acquired through taking the Money and Spirituality course with Karen McAllister.
If there is any beginner advice that I can give the readers of this blog, is that if you hear the call, I encourage you to look beyond the fear that may inhibit you and follow the guidance of your intuition; because you never know who or what beauty will be on the other side to meet you. For me it was Karen, the Teachers Qapel and Sensei, and the lovely Clear Sky community. For you it might be different: a new career, a relationship or maybe even a yearly challenge. I say this to you as a warrior sharing from the other side of the call. Finishing up my last day of the 3 month program, completing this blog post as karma yoga for my incredible mentor, Karen, and ready to embrace the next call to guide me towards my next adventure.
Thank you kindly for reading my blog post!
May All Beings Benefit
with Karen McAllister
January 21-February 11, 2023
This course is about healing the split between money and spirituality and integrating your vision and calling into your every day work. Through this course you will come to a place of peace, power, and care in your heart in your relationship with money.
We invite you to join us and release these complicated and layered knots around money.